Recipe for Capitalism

This recipe works because the combination of oppression, superiority, and exploitation really brings out the sharp flavor and wide range of undertones. Do not use substitutions for this recipe. All ingredients are essential for the authentic capitalism feel. Serves top 1% of America.

  1. Be a white heterosexual male
  2. Measure out a heaping cup of African Americans slaves as a base
  3. Steal 3 cups of sugar from your Native American neighbor
  4. Add 3 tablespoons of Irish labor, 2 teaspoons of Polish workforce, and a dash of Eastern European Jewish immigrants
  5. Whisk in 3 eggs until combined
  6. Bake at 350 for 30 min in an oven built by underpaid Asian immigrants
  7. Let cool for 200 years of Industrialism
  8. Serve generously to those in the top 1% income strata
Capitalism fresh from the oven



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